That is an order I’ve place more times that I care to count. Value meals and touring seem to go hand in hand.

Recently after placing my order it occurred to me – in my oh so analytical mind – that these are really aptly named products. I mean value meals indeed. They absolutely make a statement about what we value. For me, in this case it’s about calorie loading (don’t hate me ‘cause I’m lean) for as little money as possible. However, in this case that comes at the cost of shall we say less than healthy food. (My body and I are in discussions to find another solution besides the golden arches btw.)

My point is this, our choices reflect our values. And I think it’s about intentionality – not judging ourselves or “should-ing” all over ourselves. That’s not helpful and it’s more than a little annoying. Conscious living. Consciously honoring that each moment brings a new chance and a new choice to be claimed.

Put another way, perhaps we should be more intentional in our choices and, instead of building our values around our lives, build our lives around what we truly value.

I’m just saying.

I mean, clearly, this is not healthy. Agreed?

Okay, that was more or less my thought process recently as I was checking my phone for the latest news updates. Then I decided to call one of my best friends and it occurred to me that I pretty much have applied the 24-hour-news-cycle model to my whole life. Checking and re-checking, judging and re-judging my own thoughts, my own actions. Offering up a perpetual slew of internal “analysis” posing as news updates on the state of my success and value in this life.

I mean, clearly, this is also not healthy. Agreed?

So, my suggestion is to ease off the throttle a bit. Check-in to stay present in my life, certainly – to stay in the now – but not so much with the perpetual grading system. Maybe a little less news and a few more deep breaths and just taking in the world around me. A little less analysis and a little more giving life some room to unfold in all its beautiful chaos and order.

I mean, clearly, that’s a lot MORE healthy. Agreed?

Turn off the news.

I had the distinct honor of seeing her speak last fall. I was in what one may call a difficult transition in my personal life (you know, if one was trying to make a gross understatement). One of the first things Ms. Williamson said is something to the extent of  “Let’s get this faith or no faith question out of the way right away. Everyone has faith. The only question is in what?”

Everyone.  Has.  Faith.  The only question is in what?

Is your faith in the illness or the cure? The fear or the hope? The joy or the struggle? The purpose or the pointless? And, yes, a God or not? Turns out – as in darn near everything else – there is a choice being made. A perception being chosen and with that perception a reality of life being claimed.

In the last couple of days, I’ve found myself telling the story about myself that I’m taking a bit of a “leap of faith” personally and professionally at present. The trick is to keep shifting my focus from the “leap” part of that cliché to the “faith” part instead. In my head, Leap = scary and Faith = certain. Why would I choose the scary when the certain is right there waiting. So there is a deliberate decision to be made and made again and again – not always like ahhhh I totally feel great about that but rather sometimes just as something I do – a choice I make – because I know it’s right. You know, like a sit-up or stretching, or spinach.

Poetically enough, I’m sitting at a mechanic’s shop as I write this and he just let me know that I need new front brakes. My feeling is that you don’t mess around with brakes. So, I came back to the laptop cursing a bit and stressing about money, etc. And then I read what I had been writing and laughed. I mean this is exactly what I’m talking about on a really practical scale. Is my faith in lack or abundance? Poverty or wealth?

No doubt whatever I place my faith in - and by definition my focus on – will absolutely become more and more real in my life. This morning I’ll take a deep breath, pull out the credit card, be grateful well for oh so many things but not the least of which is that I will be able to stop my car when I need to and – when the fear of lack gets into my throat – I will shift my faith into a faith in abundance. That’s my choice. What’s yours?

One more example of this that just popped in my head. A great scene in the film Apollo 13 when the NASA who’s-who’s are discussing how big of a catastrophe this could be and the flight chief interrupts and says, “Excuse me gentlemen but I believe this will be our finest hour.”

I subscribe to an awesome daily email from Mike Dooley. Today’s was:

“In case you didn't know, you couldn't tell, or you haven't heard, if you're reading this right now on a computer, Brian, you're rich. If you have somewhere to go today, you're connected. And if there is anyone, anywhere, who for any reason knows where you are in this moment, you are loved.

Dang, you just keep acing time and space.

Big time,

The Universe”

You have faith. What’s it in?

I got to thinkin’ this week about 2 shows in particular and why I watch them. I mean really why – what do I get out of it? What’s the payoff? The first is called “Flashforward” and has sadly been cancelled without a proper finale. The basic premise was that the whole world “blacked-out” and while out glimpsed their future or, more specifically, their personal point of view of the very same moment in the future some six months ahead.

Some saw nothing at all – causing them to believe they would be dead by then. And then there were of course – literally – billions of different other futures of various shapes and sizes. Without spoiling it for you, a piece of what now turns out to be the (prematurely) final episode involves the arrival of this moment that everyone saw six months ago. In other words, they’re catching up with the future.

So every week as I sat down to Hulu to watch “Flash Forward” the thought itched in the back of my mind, “What do I find so compelling about this?” I mean, yes, it obviously raises interesting questions about fate and destiny that anyone who’s ever had a broken heart, struggled to pay a bill, or just – ya’ know – gets out of bed in the morning must think about every now and then. But there’s something else.

Then one of the characters brought into relief a really powerful thing. He was talking about this moment of catching up to the future. He was saying how he wanted to be out and about to witness it. He was saying that he wanted to see what people would do when their lives became about NOW again and not about the FUTURE. Ahhh, I thought, there it is.

And like a gentle, deep breath, “Flash Forward” gave me one last parting gift – NOW. Life is about now and not some moment I’m moving toward with whatever degree of certainty or of fear. Life is about what I do when given the chance to bear witness to now and now and now and now.           

Nice.

Then there’s a show I’ve loved for a few seasons now called “In Plain Sight” about the witness protection program (WITSEC) which hides people who are in danger for a variety of reasons. It gives these people new lives and a hides them in plain sight (get it? cute right?). Actually, there are some really powerful moments to be found here.

On a recent episode (this show’s just in mid-season), a witness decides to leave the program. One of the Marshals protests, reminding her that he’s found her a new job, new identity, new house – she thanks him and says, “But I want to be what I was born to be, WHO I was born to be.” This may cost her her life. To be clear: living her “true” life may cost her her life.

This and what follows below and a thousand tiny and earthshaking changes in my world in the last few years all flipped a switch in my brain.

The switch maybe was to a light and the light maybe is one that shines on me and shows me to be hiding out in witness protection a lot of the time willing to fade away pretending to be someone else rather than risk the mortal peril and possibilities of being who I was born to be. Then there’s the time I think I spend wrapped up in the idea of being liberated by some cosmic WITSEC program that can sweep in and give me a fresh start, a fresh chance to step into the me I most want to be.

But, as useful a tool as recognizing the shift in perspective that this switch in my head offers, I think my truth in this matter may lie closer to the wrap-up narration to this episode:

“We love what we love. For some people it’s a first grade crush, for others it’s a big wheel, the wrong guy or the New York Mets. For some of us it’s something unreachable, something maybe we’ve never had before and we know that even if we reach it, even if we pull it close and make it ours, it won’t last. It can’t. But we keep on because it doesn’t matter if it’s a big wheel, the wrong guy or the New York Mets it doesn’t matter what we reach for, what matters is the reaching.” – from In Plain Sight

I’ll only add this: Be who you are. Yes, it may kill you – that’s what life does no matter how you live it. Be who you are. Reach.

So writes Richard Bach in his book Illusions.

Over coffee, at dinner, in the break-room or teacher’s lounge, on the phone or computer - how often do you find yourself telling the same story about something annoying or awful that happened, something ugly in our world or your life? Traffic, politics, pollen; over and over this is so often how we connect and bond. You ask someone "How was your day?" You expect a sigh, shrug, and story of weary and woe. If someone replies with joy and excitement, we look at them as if they’re a bit strange and not being "real."

I don't know, maybe it's just me. I'm about to release a new record, hit the road, and launch a new business venture all in the same month. This trifecta has made me very aware of the importance of the stories I tell myself about myself. Am I the hero or the victim in my own narrative?

“Forget about what was and what will be see only the task that is.” – Legend of the Seeker

I saw myself in a friend’s story this week. She’s got a huge meeting - HUGE - with some people that have the ability to really launch her career to the stars. She was talking about her uncertainty and fear – you know – “I don’t know why they’re meeting with me, what am I gonna do, I hope I don’t screw this all up.” Finally I said stop! Enough! They’re meeting with you because you’ve earned it, you’ve earned it by rocking at what you do, and rocking is exactly how you’ll show up in the meeting.

As Marianne Williamson puts it “your playing small does not serve the world.”

The story you live is the one you tell yourself. So what am I tell myself about myself? What are you telling yourself about yourself? Not that challenging things that happen in life should be denied, but what I tell myself about something that happens in my world seems to be where I really start running into trouble – or triumph.

As my friend Mark Adam Miller (a great country singer and songwriter btw) recently posted on FB, “if you live with love, you will love. if you live with hope, you will have hope. if you live with fear, you will fear. that lifetime effect starts with kissing your babies goodnight. spread the love...”

Maybe you don’t have babies, but the point is the same. The story you are living is the one you’re telling. What’s your story?

Oh, and, there’s awesome news! You’ve got the pen and can flip the script at any time with a changed thought.

Anyhow, that’s what feels real for me this week.

I’ll leave you with one last quote that popped up on the Dead Poets Society FB fan page this week:

"Guilt is past fear, worry is future fear, live in the present." - Taylor Flack

That’s where the whole story really Is.

When I was going through my life coach training, one of the questions they posed to us was “If you could have a billboard anywhere in the city/town where you live where would it be and what would it say?” A fair number of hyjinks ensued there as well.

I love Ms. Glover’s boldness and I love this coaching question. At the heart of it, to me, is a question of impact.  What impact do you want to have – or more to the heart again – to BE on the world?

I thought of several things I might put on a billboard that would likely be along the interstate in New Orleans. Just thinking of those ideas made me feel lighter and more empowered – like I had something important to say. Then came the Super Bowl this year.

As part of the celebration, I went out and bought myself one of those paint pens people use when they’re selling their car so they can write on the windows. I wrote: HONK IF YOU’RE A WHO DAT! and BLACK & GOLD SUPER BOWL and FINISH STRONG! Don’t worry, I could still see to drive. This turned out to be so much fun between the honking and the smiling waves and just the connection it opened with people around me. Even better, if I got in the car feeling down or frustrated about something, either somebody would honk or slow down to read or I would just look in the rearview mirror and suddenly find myself smiling. As usual, the things we think we’re doing to and/or for the world are really mostly about what we need.

Anyway, all that was so much fun and it occurred to me that I had found my “billboard.” Now each week I put a new thought on the rear windshield and then carry that thought everywhere I drive with my portable billboard. It gives me a chance every week to stop for a few minutes to think what impact I want to have in the world, but also (and perhaps more importantly) what impact do I most need to have on ME this week. I also write on my mirror in my bathroom. It’s endlessly interesting to me that as unified and big as the darkness in my mind can sometimes feel, it almost always turns out to be the tiniest (and often seemingly silliest) of things that I do that begin to dislodge its grip over me.

Sooo, IF YOU COULD HAVE A BILLBOARD ANYWHERE IN THE PLACE YOU LIVE (and you can) WHERE WOULD IT BE AND WHAT WOULD IT SAY?

BTW, this week mine says, “U R ON YOUR WAY TO A MIRACLE.” Because, you know, you kinda always are.

Be good to you.

Brian

For example, Lesly says, “Okay Brian and Mike, you are a pair of diamond earings. Go.” Part of my brain starts launching into judgment and criticism of everything I might do and/or think to do. I mean who among us doesn’t leave a conversation, meeting, date, or party going “I can’t believe I said/did that. That was so lame. Ugh.” Another part stands up tall, hands at my sides kind of curtseys a bit says wistfully and with loud enthusiasm “Sparkle!” turning to face different parts of the room as I repeatedly do so. I don’t know if that’s funny or not on its merits. What I do know is it is precisely what came to me in the moment and that I wasn’t thinking of my list of things to do and that I wasn’t playing my “you suck” tape in my head and that I was simply being present. AND it was SUPER fun!

Improv requires one to turn the nonsense off. To feel what’s happening right now and then to respond to the moment in whatever way comes up, with total commitment and passionate authenticity and without judgment or internal criticism. So pretty much you get to be a kid again.

Having dabbled just a bit with this one class, I feel braver in my daily life and less hung up on any given moment. I am reminded that, as Emerson wrote, “All life is an experiment.” And it all feels just a bit more playful and fun. Not a bad lesson to live, right? So, quick – be…yourself. Weeee!!!

"Well, Mahoney...  --Don't go.--   My darling.  --I'm not ready.I'm not ready for it to end.--  I'm sorry.   

When King Lear dies in Act 5, do you know what Shakespeare has written? He's written, "He dies." That's all, nothing more.  No fanfare, no metaphor, no brilliant final words. The culmination of the most influential work of dramatic literature is: 'He dies.'   

It takes Shakespeare, a genius, to come up with 'He dies.' And yet every time I read those two words, I find myself overwhelmed with dysphoria. And I know it's only natural to be sad, BUT NOT BECAUSE OF THE WORDS 'HE DIES,' BUT BECAUSE OF THE LIFE WE SAW PRIOR TO THE WORDS. I've lived all five of my acts, Mahoney, and I am not asking you to be happy that I must go. I'm only asking that you turn the page, continue reading...and let the next story begin.

And if anyone ever asks what became of me, you RELATE MY LIFE IN ALL ITS WONDER, and end it with a simple and modest 'He died.'"

-- from the movie Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium

This past weekend I attended a memorial celebration service for my friend Toby Morriss. He was flawed and perfect. Loving and scared. In short, he was human. What is so powerful to me about Toby, however, was how full his life was. I mean, if you stood up to eulogize him, you could truthfully bemoan the brevity of his life (36 years old) but there's no way - no way - you could truthfully say word one about how he had missed out on so much. He filled is life with...well...Life.

I was also struck by the character of the towns we gather. Being at that celebration service was like being in Toby-town, USA. Here are many of the folks Toby has touched gathered together for the first time. Here is a pictorial representation of the legacy of a person. His looked like a biker bar, Woodstock, campus rally, and bingo hall all blended together with an energy that radiated loving kindness. What would yours look like?

So, I originally sat down to write a blog about living a passionate life or something like that. I guess, in the end, that is in fact what this turned out to be. It seems to me, we each fill our "wonder emporium" with exactly as much life and color as we create. Honestly some days my color palette is darker than others and some days getting out of bed is easier than others. Today it was death that reminded me of Life.

Thank you, Toby, for filling your brief play with passion, drama, humanity, kindness, love and lots of hugs. Full indeed. You will be missed. You will be here as the story continues. Much love Brother.

(you can find more about Toby on Facebook - F. Tobias Morriss)

MODERATOR

Governor Ritchie, many economists have stated that the tax cut, which is centerpiece of your economic agenda, could actually harm the economy. Is now really the time to cut taxes? 

RITCHIE

You bet it is. We need to cut taxes for one reason-- the American people know how to spend their money better than the federal government does.

MODERATOR

Mr. President, your rebuttal.

BARTLET

There it is. That's the ten-word answer my staff's been looking for for two weeks. There it is. Ten-word answers can kill you in political campaigns. They're the tip of the sword. Here's my question: What are the next ten words of your answer?

Why mention that here? Because our lives are defined by the next 10 words.

Don’t let me or anybody else who might move you with some bumper-sticker philosophy try and tell you any different. It is entirely about the next 10 words. So much of what I do in my professional life is about the first 10 – the 10 that inspire and motivate. But those words, absent of 10 more to whisper of action, 10 more to begin to chart whatever is next are just hollow, worse they’re poisonous. Toxic because, after the inevitable let down, they leave us increasingly suspect of hope. That simply won’t do.

Do you put gas in your car to put it up on blocks and run it in your driveway? No, of course not. You put gas in to go somewhere. You might listen to a song, read something, watch a movie, meet someone, get a vacation, or any number of other ways to find yourself inspired to travel, but it is on you to pick a destination, to chart a course. This is good news. You get to decide.

So, seek out the “10 words” that light your soul on fire. Seek them and swallow them and live them and then – most important of all – write the next 10 for yourself. Be bold. Be daring. As Emerson put it:

“Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment.”

– Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do it now.

A champion?

I’ve had an incredible life thus far full of abundant joy, searing pain, and amazing adventures. This particular moment - this championship moment - is among the top. It’s not about sports really, for those of you who may be confused by the fervor around this team and this moment apparently in sports. It’s just not about that.

For me, it’s about belonging. It’s about claiming your right to be who you are time and again in the face of hell and highwater and then finally - finally - gaining perch on some land. It’s about feeling like some cosmic force somewhere is saying, “You have struggled enough. For this moment stand to be counted, stand to claim your name and place, stand to celebrate, stand to be called by your true name – Champion.” (And you thought is was a football game.)

So, yes, we cried and screamed and jumped and hugged and ran and “who dat-ed” our brains out. And when the Saints finally did come marching in we were, in fact, a part of that number. Belonging at last to something that was simply and profoundly beautiful and good.

Bless you boys. And may God bless the City of New Orleans.